< SoTodayAtSchool

Reaching

I have been reaching out to people around me more for help. I have a clearer mind today than I did yesterday. The biggest thing for me today is dealing with my career. I am a 21 year old sophomore and I don’t see a career in fast food paying for things or leading to a writing career. I guess I am anxious. I have been reaching out to God for guidance and even my sister but I find no peace in asking others what they feel I should do with my life. 

2015: I really want to go to SK and be involved in the TaLk program. I really thing that the experience would get my foot into a company, any company. My sister thinks I’ll get taken. What will my parents think. All I know is that I am tired of not being able to support myself financially and not meeting new people. 

I understand the spiritual side of life too that somethings take process. Sometimes a person is not ready for certain things. Somethings will come only if we wait for them to emerge. But waiting for someone else’s business to take off is hard because you have no control over it. They don’t see that you have responsibilities sometimes. It feels weird to say but it is the truth. I have to look out for me. I have things I have to pay for and a career that I have to build. I must focus my energy on building that career. But what is it?

It is hard staying motivated at times when you don’t have a clear end goal. My is to graduate and then what?

I’m breaking my wrists trying to find internships that I actually qualify for that my parents and pockets will allow me go for. I have dreams, starting a non-profit, being a TV writer, making a difference. The problem is I have no idea where to start or how to get there.  

I question everything. Is this even the right major for me? What the heck am I doing? Why is it that I have a medium rare GPA in classes of my own major? That leads to more questions. Am I on the right path? Should I become a nurse instead of a Video editor?

At those moments my dreams as a content creator dwindle to nothingness.

The communication field is wide open. Where do I start?